Another Owed Birthday Fic
Apr. 5th, 2007 05:02 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dethoratsThis is for ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
sherriaisling, who wanted xxxHolic fic. This is my first attempt at such, so I apologize for the weirdness and what have you. She requested a look at Doumeki and Watanuki's relationship from another person's eyes and I ended up going with Himawari.
Title: Like a Fox
Rating: PG
Pairing: Definite Doumeki->Watanuki and some slight Watanuki->Doumeki, mentions of Watanuki->Himawari
Word Count: 1203
Note: Written in 1st person
He knows I know. He often knows. And even when he doesn’t, he lets you think he does. He doesn’t care that I know, though. Sometimes he even uses it for his own advantage. It’s one of the things I like about him. Doumeki-kun is…well, he’s Doumeki-kun. Yuuko-san knows everything, though, and in spite of how he is, Doumeki-kun is no Yuuko-san. She said something to me, that horrible day when Watanuki-kun fell from the window. “Look at Doumeki-kun’s eyes. Half-lidded and guarded. He’s a sly one, Doumeki Shizuka, though I suppose it’s another one of those traits that just happens to run in his family.” Calling Doumeki-kun ‘sly’ seems a little bit rude but that’s Yuuko-san for you. It comes from knowing everything I suppose. I know Watanuki-kun complains about how much she drinks but I think that’s just because he doesn’t want to see. Doumeki-kun has seen it, of course, seen and understood and taken it in with the same sort of calm he seems to take in everything that isn’t Watanuki-kun.
Doumeki-kun is always watching. He’s quiet until he needs to speak and then he says exactly what he wants to say, usually exactly what is needed, and then he goes back to keeping to himself, just observing everything around him. I don’t know how he got that way; maybe it comes from growing up in a shrine and being surrounded by other people’s problems or maybe that’s just Doumeki-kun. But he sees, sees even more now that he and Watanuki-kun are sharing an eye. And what he sees, he tends to see with absolute clarity. He knows why Yuuko-san drinks. Her burden is heavy and very serious.
Watanuki-kun’s is too. It must be, for Yuuko-san to pay as much attention to him as she does. And I think Watanuki-kun knows this, somewhere deep inside, but he doesn’t want to acknowledge it. Watanuki-kun is a special person and that bothers him because he is the kind of individual who hates to draw attention to himself. So Yuuko-san treats him as she does, uses him and teases him and doesn’t give him a moment of free time to reflect on just why he’s really in her shop. It works, sometimes too well, because Watanuki is a giving person underneath all of his protests.
My dear sweet Watanuki-kun. And my knowing, determined Doumeki-kun. My friends, the only ones I have, and I’m too selfish to give them up. Doumeki-kun is immune and he is a blessing, someone safe in a world where everyone I meet is at risk of death. Watanuki-kun takes that risk because he truly doesn’t care. He is happy to be with me, in spite of everything, and I can’t take that from him. As long as Doumeki-kun is there, acting as the shield he is, there can be no harm in it.
Giving. They both give so much even if Watanuki-kun only ever accuses Doumeki-kun of taking. I suppose it’s because he’s being willfully blind again. Stubborn they both are too. But I think Doumeki-kun’s more obstinate than Watanuki-kun and that is a good thing because he needs to be there no matter what Watanuki-kun says or does. He comes along with us for Watanuki’s sake, protecting, and for mine as well because he’s my friend despite the fact that I should be his rival.
Sometimes I wish I was, a little. Watanuki-kun is a lovely young man, talented and generous and kind, and any person would be lucky to get to stay by his side always. But I know who I am and what I cause and no matter how much he might be accepting of me, I won’t do that to Watanuki-kun. I’ve nearly killed him and I’d rather break his heart than see him die because of me. I’m lucky, though that seems strange to say, instead because Watanuki-kun, for all that he thinks he loves me, is starting to love another. And that love is returned steadily and patiently and with everything Doumeki-kun is. Every fiber of his being, every drop of his blood and every piece of his soul, it all belongs to Watanuki-kun even if our friend doesn’t see it yet.
I wonder once in a while how Doumeki-kun stands it, being harangued and insulted and ignored by the one he so clearly loves. But then Watanuki-kun turns around and thanks him, usually wordlessly, and I understand. So much of what they have is hidden and not wrapped about by words. It’s all in actions and gestures, a bento here, an arrow fired there, so many bits and pieces of favors owed and repaid that the ledger is too confusing to bother with anymore and so they don’t.
Watanuki-kun doesn’t like being caught in these acts and I admit it makes me happy to tease him, watch him blush and even more, watch the way his face coloring makes Doumeki-kun flush ever so slightly in return. Yuuko-san does what she can to push them together, keep them close, and now I don’t think it’s just to keep Watanuki-kun from harm. She knows everything, after all and she can get away with it. I can too, usually, and I enjoy doing it, flustering Watanuki-kun and paying back just a little of what I owe to Doumeki-kun for his unwavering friendship. We keep throwing them together and Watanuki-kun keeps floundering and Doumeki-kun is always there, a solid support for him to cling to and yell at until he feels calm again.
Eventually Watanuki-kun will be worn down. I suspect this is what Doumeki-kun believes, although I don’t know how much longer his patience will hold out. The danger around Watanuki-kun seems to grow ever stronger and some days it feels like time is running out. But I have faith in Doumeki-kun. He’s…resourceful…and clever and he knows Watanuki-kun better in some ways than our friend knows himself. Doumeki-kun can always get Watanuki-kun to make him lunch or participate in activities and he does pretty well keeping him from what harm he can. He says the right things, pushes the right buttons, goads Watanuki-kun and then our friend is acting almost before he knows what he is doing.
Okay, so Yuuko-san is right. Doumeki-kun is sly, even though I do think that isn’t something I would ever tell him to his face. He is leading Watanuki-kun down a crooked and backtracking path that circles and sometimes leads to dead-ends but ultimately in this maze that he’s built for our friend to blunder through is himself. Doumeki-kun is waiting at the center and when Watanuki-kun finally gets there, he’s going to think he’s the one who started the whole thing because that’s how Doumeki-kun operates. Let Watanuki-kun think it was his idea in the first place and then he’ll be trapped, have no choice but to go along with it. I hope I’m there when that happens. I’m looking forward to seeing just what Doumeki-kun has in mind to convince Watanuki-kun to kiss him. I’m pretty sure he’s fast enough to catch Watanuki-kun’s hand when it follows through to slap him. And if he’s not? Well, as Yuuko-san says, everything is hitsuzen, just like they will be.
sherriaisling, who wanted xxxHolic fic. This is my first attempt at such, so I apologize for the weirdness and what have you. She requested a look at Doumeki and Watanuki's relationship from another person's eyes and I ended up going with Himawari. Title: Like a Fox
Rating: PG
Pairing: Definite Doumeki->Watanuki and some slight Watanuki->Doumeki, mentions of Watanuki->Himawari
Word Count: 1203
Note: Written in 1st person
He knows I know. He often knows. And even when he doesn’t, he lets you think he does. He doesn’t care that I know, though. Sometimes he even uses it for his own advantage. It’s one of the things I like about him. Doumeki-kun is…well, he’s Doumeki-kun. Yuuko-san knows everything, though, and in spite of how he is, Doumeki-kun is no Yuuko-san. She said something to me, that horrible day when Watanuki-kun fell from the window. “Look at Doumeki-kun’s eyes. Half-lidded and guarded. He’s a sly one, Doumeki Shizuka, though I suppose it’s another one of those traits that just happens to run in his family.” Calling Doumeki-kun ‘sly’ seems a little bit rude but that’s Yuuko-san for you. It comes from knowing everything I suppose. I know Watanuki-kun complains about how much she drinks but I think that’s just because he doesn’t want to see. Doumeki-kun has seen it, of course, seen and understood and taken it in with the same sort of calm he seems to take in everything that isn’t Watanuki-kun.
Doumeki-kun is always watching. He’s quiet until he needs to speak and then he says exactly what he wants to say, usually exactly what is needed, and then he goes back to keeping to himself, just observing everything around him. I don’t know how he got that way; maybe it comes from growing up in a shrine and being surrounded by other people’s problems or maybe that’s just Doumeki-kun. But he sees, sees even more now that he and Watanuki-kun are sharing an eye. And what he sees, he tends to see with absolute clarity. He knows why Yuuko-san drinks. Her burden is heavy and very serious.
Watanuki-kun’s is too. It must be, for Yuuko-san to pay as much attention to him as she does. And I think Watanuki-kun knows this, somewhere deep inside, but he doesn’t want to acknowledge it. Watanuki-kun is a special person and that bothers him because he is the kind of individual who hates to draw attention to himself. So Yuuko-san treats him as she does, uses him and teases him and doesn’t give him a moment of free time to reflect on just why he’s really in her shop. It works, sometimes too well, because Watanuki is a giving person underneath all of his protests.
My dear sweet Watanuki-kun. And my knowing, determined Doumeki-kun. My friends, the only ones I have, and I’m too selfish to give them up. Doumeki-kun is immune and he is a blessing, someone safe in a world where everyone I meet is at risk of death. Watanuki-kun takes that risk because he truly doesn’t care. He is happy to be with me, in spite of everything, and I can’t take that from him. As long as Doumeki-kun is there, acting as the shield he is, there can be no harm in it.
Giving. They both give so much even if Watanuki-kun only ever accuses Doumeki-kun of taking. I suppose it’s because he’s being willfully blind again. Stubborn they both are too. But I think Doumeki-kun’s more obstinate than Watanuki-kun and that is a good thing because he needs to be there no matter what Watanuki-kun says or does. He comes along with us for Watanuki’s sake, protecting, and for mine as well because he’s my friend despite the fact that I should be his rival.
Sometimes I wish I was, a little. Watanuki-kun is a lovely young man, talented and generous and kind, and any person would be lucky to get to stay by his side always. But I know who I am and what I cause and no matter how much he might be accepting of me, I won’t do that to Watanuki-kun. I’ve nearly killed him and I’d rather break his heart than see him die because of me. I’m lucky, though that seems strange to say, instead because Watanuki-kun, for all that he thinks he loves me, is starting to love another. And that love is returned steadily and patiently and with everything Doumeki-kun is. Every fiber of his being, every drop of his blood and every piece of his soul, it all belongs to Watanuki-kun even if our friend doesn’t see it yet.
I wonder once in a while how Doumeki-kun stands it, being harangued and insulted and ignored by the one he so clearly loves. But then Watanuki-kun turns around and thanks him, usually wordlessly, and I understand. So much of what they have is hidden and not wrapped about by words. It’s all in actions and gestures, a bento here, an arrow fired there, so many bits and pieces of favors owed and repaid that the ledger is too confusing to bother with anymore and so they don’t.
Watanuki-kun doesn’t like being caught in these acts and I admit it makes me happy to tease him, watch him blush and even more, watch the way his face coloring makes Doumeki-kun flush ever so slightly in return. Yuuko-san does what she can to push them together, keep them close, and now I don’t think it’s just to keep Watanuki-kun from harm. She knows everything, after all and she can get away with it. I can too, usually, and I enjoy doing it, flustering Watanuki-kun and paying back just a little of what I owe to Doumeki-kun for his unwavering friendship. We keep throwing them together and Watanuki-kun keeps floundering and Doumeki-kun is always there, a solid support for him to cling to and yell at until he feels calm again.
Eventually Watanuki-kun will be worn down. I suspect this is what Doumeki-kun believes, although I don’t know how much longer his patience will hold out. The danger around Watanuki-kun seems to grow ever stronger and some days it feels like time is running out. But I have faith in Doumeki-kun. He’s…resourceful…and clever and he knows Watanuki-kun better in some ways than our friend knows himself. Doumeki-kun can always get Watanuki-kun to make him lunch or participate in activities and he does pretty well keeping him from what harm he can. He says the right things, pushes the right buttons, goads Watanuki-kun and then our friend is acting almost before he knows what he is doing.
Okay, so Yuuko-san is right. Doumeki-kun is sly, even though I do think that isn’t something I would ever tell him to his face. He is leading Watanuki-kun down a crooked and backtracking path that circles and sometimes leads to dead-ends but ultimately in this maze that he’s built for our friend to blunder through is himself. Doumeki-kun is waiting at the center and when Watanuki-kun finally gets there, he’s going to think he’s the one who started the whole thing because that’s how Doumeki-kun operates. Let Watanuki-kun think it was his idea in the first place and then he’ll be trapped, have no choice but to go along with it. I hope I’m there when that happens. I’m looking forward to seeing just what Doumeki-kun has in mind to convince Watanuki-kun to kiss him. I’m pretty sure he’s fast enough to catch Watanuki-kun’s hand when it follows through to slap him. And if he’s not? Well, as Yuuko-san says, everything is hitsuzen, just like they will be.
